its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
