so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
I had to cum in my sink.
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