Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
