last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
