how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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