if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Randomize
