dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Randomize
