I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
