i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
