Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
