he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Redeem this text for a blowjob
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
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