whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Randomize
