According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
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