Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
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