Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize