i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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