Small penises have feelings too.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
operation harelip BJ is a go
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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