We're like a lot better than the average bears
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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