too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
You know, be my cock's hype man.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize