Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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