What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Randomize
