Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Just high enough for therapy.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
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