u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
