Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Randomize
