there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Randomize
