just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Randomize
