yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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