...so i touched it.
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
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