i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
