And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
