it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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