girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
