Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
