You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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