question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
