Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize