I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
Small penises have feelings too.
please come you make the beer taste better
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
not ubering you a puppy
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
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