Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
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