I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
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