i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I smell stomach acid.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Randomize
