This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
