I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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