i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
