Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
