spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
pop tarts are not kleenex
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
