trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Randomize
