Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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