Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
