what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
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