"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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