She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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